Forfeiting Love

Gradually your company have grow to be natural; a constant in my life.
You are forever somewhere; anywhere in my midst.
At times I can sense your gaze piercing my back; my head.
You are there; here, somewhere close by.

I sit here expecting you to be behind me, doubting if I should turn.
The air bears your aroma; if I listen closely, maybe I will hear you breathe.
I spin around to astonish you with my awareness, just to find that you aren’t there.
Then; I close my eyes and there you are a beautiful picture in my mind.

You linger around and I sense your closeness always.
In my head I have a multitude of pictures of all the great times we’ve had.
The essence of you never part from me.
You have wedged yourself deep within my heart.

No longer do I have the luxury of choice to love or not; it is pure automation.
My senses have a habitual response at your attendance.
I am not in control; every part of me is captivated with emotion.
What sweet sorrow this detention is.

It is beyond me to cease these tendencies; endorphins are in control.
Do not dispose of me, for that which I am powerless to direct.
Am I besotted with you; oh, undeniably yes.
I am in awe of you, like a schoolboy forfeiting his heart the first time.

I feel that I could die for you, should you be in danger.
I could easily expire for you without any danger or threat at all.
At times I wish I could perish, when I am remote of you.
Why do I have to yearn for your affection so?

That’s that; it’s a treaty, my heart is assigned to you.
The foremost love I have ever known will escape me always.
But; remotely I will observe and consent to the finest promising life exclusive of me.
I will endure the ache of witnessing you adore another; your contentment as reward.

This fondness is not so sweet at all; it stings like a wasp that never stops.
It cripples my emotions and places a scar through the length of my heart.
It is not easy, but an act of true love; to see someone you love, love.
So, with this my affectionate gift; pursue with freedom your every dream.
By : Thys Groesbeek