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Gradually
your company have grow to be natural; a constant in my
life. You are forever somewhere; anywhere in my midst. At times I can sense your gaze piercing my back; my head. You are there; here, somewhere close by. I sit here expecting you to be behind me, doubting if I should turn. The air bears your aroma; if I listen closely, maybe I will hear you breathe. I spin around to astonish you with my awareness, just to find that you aren’t there. Then; I close my eyes and there you are a beautiful picture in my mind. You linger around and I sense your closeness always. In my head I have a multitude of pictures of all the great times we’ve had. The essence of you never part from me. You have wedged yourself deep within my heart. No longer do I have the luxury of choice to love or not; it is pure automation. My senses have a habitual response at your attendance. I am not in control; every part of me is captivated with emotion. What sweet sorrow this detention is. It is beyond me to cease these tendencies; endorphins are in control. Do not dispose of me, for that which I am powerless to direct. Am I besotted with you; oh, undeniably yes. I am in awe of you, like a schoolboy forfeiting his heart the first time. I feel that I could die for you, should you be in danger. I could easily expire for you without any danger or threat at all. At times I wish I could perish, when I am remote of you. Why do I have to yearn for your affection so? That’s that; it’s a treaty, my heart is assigned to you. The foremost love I have ever known will escape me always. But; remotely I will observe and consent to the finest promising life exclusive of me. I will endure the ache of witnessing you adore another; your contentment as reward. This fondness is not so sweet at all; it stings like a wasp that never stops. It cripples my emotions and places a scar through the length of my heart. It is not easy, but an act of true love; to see someone you love, love. So, with this my affectionate gift; pursue with freedom your every dream. |
| By : Thys Groesbeek |